this one goes out to my parents with love...

my favourite memories each year never fails to include the chinese new year.. as a child, it's THE event to look forward to all year... the only event my parents go all out to celebrate. christmas, english new year, good friday, overseas trips.. they all din exist in my dictionary.

every year without fail we'd go to chinatown market.. i rmb i'd ride on my dad's shoulders as a toddler, den as a child, all i could see were other people's butts in the crowd... then i'd complain and my daddy will carry me... i rmb clearly at that time, i kept thinking i'll never grow tall enough to see the stalls.

but i did grow up. and as days pass and work swept me away, i found myself thinking that new year seems more like a chore den an enjoyment this year. i just don't have the time n effort to shop for new clothes or new shoes, and i dun see the point. afterall i'll be in uni like, 5days a week..! so i jus bought wadever i like. i din think. i din plan. and it turned out everything i bought was pink, white or black.

my parents are not happy people.. jus cos it was said dat my lucky colour is RED, orange n brown this year. ugly colours!! i thought it ridiculous. i mean, wad's the point of buying a shirt i wun wear, jus cos it's "lucky"? and i got angry at them for being angry at me.

but ytd night i went to chinatown market with my parents, and i realised dat all these nights dat they went chinatown without me, (i was busy), all they've been doing is to keep looking out for shirts.. for me. i was suddenly struck by the fact that it really bothers my parents.. cos i'm supposedly going to have a disastrous year ahead, and they're worried and are trying to do wad they can.

so though i din believe it's gonna make a difference wad colour i wear when the new year begins, i bought a shirt i din really like. i bought a shirt my parents like. and i will wear it.. often. cos when i see my dad in a teenage girl's store frantically trying to find the shirt they liked, when i see my mum queueing up for the fitting room for me, when i see my sister helping me ask for newest designs.. i jus felt so loved. =) my family cares. and that shirt will remind me of that.

i've been bad lately. very very bad. work is but an excuse. i was preoccupied with v'day, with my own world.. that i failed to do my part. i was the one who liked all the pigs new year decorations, who bugged my dad to buy new decorations.. yet my dad was the one who stayed up till 3am to put it up. i was the one who din bother to clear up my room.. yet my mum was the one who spent every afternoon clearing.. i was the one whose wardrobe is exploding, yet my sister was the one who packed all the clothes.

im sorry. =x im looking forward to new year spent with my family! i'll try harder.

which explains why i went to the night market jus now with my parents.. daddy taught me how to choose fresh prawns! and mummy taught me how to choose fresh sotong... i was happy. and thinking i can be a housewife.. when i saw sth that made me tear. it was a fish out of water. struggling for air.. flipping it's fins. and all anyone said was.. "Wow how fresh".

i wanted to cry... here i was, looking at a a living thing struggling at it's last moments, and it's all becos humans like myself wanted it to be food. fresh food. it's disgusting.. can u imagine if human becomes food to aliens one day, and all anyone cared abt was how fresh we are, how nice our meat taste when we get EATEN? the fish was a living thing! it had a life. and we took it away cos we're hungry. and it's not like we HAVE to eat them. we can eat vegetables! (eeeew vegetables)

im so gonna be a vegetarian one day.

=( on a brighter note, let's have a look at my newest pet!!! the... PIGPLANT!